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By Eva Hoffman

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Its weight threatened to crush me and everything in its path. But it had a kind of beauty in it, the beauty of the ineffable which cannot be grasped. Even if the ineffable is composed of pure menace. Perhaps my composition should be just that sound. Infinitely extended and minimally wavering within. A condensed black hole of sonic matter, within which the particles and waves of former life can still be obscurely sensed. It is twelve years to the day since I began the Requiem. Perhaps that is why I had the dream.

Thank you,” she says, because she doesn’t know what else to say. He gives a small bow again and turns abruptly to leave. ” There are a few more people who’ve been waiting to speak to her, and whom Rougement discreetly hurries along. Then he brings her coat, and helps her put it on quite gently. “Wonderful,” he says. “Believe me, you were very good. ” She feels a warm candle lick of satisfaction. A task accomplished, a labor in beauty. ” Rougement asks. “Perhaps next time,” she says, feeling apologetic again.

She mentally asks Peter; and she imagines him looking at her with his steady, intelligent eyes, and saying, no. The answer to that is no. Lyons In Lyons, a brief stop at the hotel, then the concert. A venerable nineteenth-century hall, a relaxed, attentive audience. She plays Bach’s First Partita to begin with. It seems fitting, somehow, in this dignified old town, to be contained within Bach’s serene symmetries. It is a deep satisfaction to progress through the propellent, perpetuum mobile progressions, through the even, irrefutable logic which itself adds up to a kind of joy.

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